11-13-26. I stress, I make no claims to perfection, but, I am open. Sometimes “letting go” is the best policy. When all outreach fails, imperfect as it may be, let go. It can hurt, because it can be misunderstood, and it may always be “your fault.” Some people don’t want to be provoked, they want to be acquiesced to, especially by threatening entities like myself, who are not easily contained. These are difficult teachings. Whatever one does, or doesn’t do, is judged.
I distinguish “letting go” from “moving on.” “Letting go” essentially allows the bridge to burn, gracefully, from a distance, come what may. “Moving on” is a social inclusion demand to overlook prior abject treachery, perceived or otherwise, and assumes a continuance of relationship without requiring past reconciliation, the idea of reconciliation being you talk it out. I’m not into “moving on.” “Moving on” is not justice.
There is a third variant, to be “cut-off.” Reconciliation being out of the question because it challenges acceptable superiority/inferiority assumptions, the only resolution is to last-word blame the other and purge all incoming contact. Victory in repression. I’ve never pulled that cowardly shit, which is what it is, but have had it pulled on me.
Once in particular, challenging calumny, calling two vicious slanders each a “filthy fucking lie,” I was “cut off” (the actual phrase was used the last time, the first time it was a simple last-word “Fuck you.”) for lengthy periods. I should be honored of my threatening, fearful influence on this particular shallow, superficial boasting fool’s existence who demands acquiescence from me, but I would rather have mutual respect reconciliation, a likely impossibility.
For some, the important thing is to show up, do the rounds as it were. If you do the rounds, with appropriate frequency, all else, any other behavior outside of the rounds, scoundrel it may be, is “none of my business,” so I’ve heard, more than once. One hundred percent of acceptance is in showing up, and, of course, not being provocative which is wasteful, stupid and unfun.
I once heard say not doing the claimed obligatory social rounds was worse than abusing one’s spouse. The word “worse” was actually used in comparison. I’ll never forget that. It gave me a lasting perspective on the values of some others.
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11-12-26. I have a low tolerance for boasting and chatter. Triviality bores me. Initial encounters, OK. Beyond that, if you don’t appreciate or are fearful of provocative, open up ambiguity politics and religion balanced participation sharing, we’re unlikely to get along for long. If you invite me, expect me to be myself. It’s not that I mean to upset anybody, or be disrespectful, it’s just that I don’t care for boasting, chatter and trivia, other than as minor adjuncts to a sincere opening up. I will not acquiesce to it as the sole basis for inclusion.
I have developed a “mute diplomatic mode” to get by when necessity dictates. I can only pull this off with any sincerity once in a while, without appearing extremely contrived and uncomfortable. I don’t traipse around and make social calls out of an imposed “obligation.” If that’s unsocial for you, that’s OK with me. I’d rather be alone. Better still, I know there are folks like me that value the kind of interaction that appreciates seeking the highest common denominator, copes with ambiguity, and shares openness. Why not? Life is vast. Onto death go we all.
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11-11-26. Identifying “Shelter” as “monitored contained environments,” if there were sufficient shelter, would force be justified to remove street campers? Put another way, “if you are indigent and can’t do it stealth, round them up.”
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11-8-26. Bob Lamonica: Why the US must maintain military supremacy
Santa Cruz Sentinel, November 2012
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11-5-26. Will One-liner Therapy save me? From death, no. From the vicissitudes of life, maybe, looking back, sometimes always. I once read that all laughter can be traced back to laughing at death. My first experience with death, I was 9 years old, pushing 10. I laughed. About 15 years later I asked a trusted someone what their first experience with death was, the response, “I laughed.” Onto death go we all. HaHaHa. Have a nice day.
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11-4-26. A prime example of calumny, and the cut-off, recently. When I appeared to acquiesce and subjugate to shallow, superficial boasting, the realm of fools, all was forgiven. When I asked to reconcile the past, out came the filthy fucking lie, and with it, calumny. It doesn’t matter what the truth is, it’s who discredits whom. Nothing to do but accept the unfortunately predictable outcome, and let go.
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11-3-26. Interesting how things “balance out,” on the same day even. Maybe it’s just an outlook on “The teachings are everywhere,” the way of flow, I don’t know. I know I am imperfect. “We all have our idiosyncrasies,” was said to me many years ago. I also know I reach out. Often, I’m the one who does the outreach. I tentatively concluded that I frighten some people long ago by my candor, and my lack of superficial appreciation.
I marvel at the one-sided approach of some. It can hurt, but that has to be OK. Things end, and things begin. Again, I stress, I make no claims to perfection, BUT, I am open. Vulnerability can be seen as a flaw by those whose shit doesn’t stink. OK, so it’s all my fault. “You use foul language.” Saying, “That’s a filthy fucking lie” is my fault, and a grievous, unforgivable one. I’m OK with that. Good literature is made of this stuff. They get their ideas from real life. “Confusion will be my epitaph.” Onto death go we all.
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11-2-26. Are you the victim of my jealous envy? Please advise, so I can clean up my act. There can be no possible alternative explanation for not acquiescing to shallow, superficial boasting, the realm of fools. Besides, it doesn’t matter what the truth is, it’s who discredits whom. Lying punk scoundrels require subjugation, as in “I’m a hotshot, you’re nobody.” Mutual respect is for losers who don’t value the authority to debase and ridicule. If you appear to threaten motor-mouthing superiority, expect the long-winded lie. If you don’t acquiesce then, you may be deemed untrustworthy and “cut-off.” HaHaHa.
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“Political Parties”
September 2017
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September-October 2026 City Desk